Extreme Pours

spillwine.jpg “I’ll be pouring some excellent Cab Francs today.” Whatever happened to “We’re tasting some excellent Cab Francs today?” Everyone seems to be pouring everywhere these days. Am I the only person who thinks that this sounds strange? What would the equivalent be with chocolate chip cookies? “I’ll be placing some excellent chocolate chip cookies today?” Perhaps it’s the “me” part – I’ll be pouring – that seems odd. It’s a little like when a waiter says “my marzipan is really delicious” or “I’ve got some amazing Chimichangas.” I’m sure you do. Or maybe it’s just that the term pouring seems to imply vast amounts of liquids gushing forth as in “it’s not just raining, it’s pouring!” Pouring wine rapidly and in huge volumes doesn’t seem to be strange at all on the internet; in fact it’s de rigueur. A quick browse around most wine sites reveals wine being poured in ways that would put NASA velocity tests to shame. Is the subject really so boring that it needs to be tarted up by pushing the limits of fluid mechanics? Are the stock photo people really that bored? Was a stunt sommelier employed for any of these shots? Do I hear Eric Burdon and War playing Spill the Wine somewhere? Obviously there are a lot of unanswered questions here, so before I really scare myself and become Andy Rooney, the candidates for the most Extreme Pour of 2007 (in no apparent order) are:

Kapture Group Inc.

kapturegroup-com.jpg Not a wine site, but the Kapture Group sells equipment to help capture moments of vinous mayhem like the typhoon in a glass pictured here.

New York Times

new-york-times.jpg Eric Asimov’s blog is called The Pour so it should come as no surprise that they have a strong entry. A real study of contrasts here as a heavy rope of wine appears to be breaking the surface of an otherwise tranquil glass. Sediment be damned – get it in the glass!

Nat Decants

nat-decants.jpg Is that a giant red wine Cobra threatening Natalie MacLean’s wholesome head? Watch out Natalie!

67 Wine

67-com.jpg Not a lot of action here but a lot of wine. Do still waters run deep? The half-full half-empty debate certainly has no room here. No! Fill it to the brim! Let it be known that the people of 67 Wine are not stingy!

Dining on the Vine

diningonthevine-com.jpg Given the apparent lack of gravity, I would call this site Dining on the Moon instead of Dining on the Vine. Is that a bottle or a hose? Waiter, please bring me the 1990 La Tâche and a mop!

Royal Doulton

royaldoulton-com.jpg The quintessential British tableware maker weighs in with a classic Poseidon Adventure pour. Either that or they’re introducing a line of Chablis coloured baby Baboons in crystal. Please Vote:
{democracy:8}

Win a Shiny New Spittoon!

spittoon.gif To enter, simply leave a comment below. A winner will be selected Monday December 17th at random. You don't have to write anything clever. A simple "nice spittoon" will do.

60 Comments

Duarte da Silva
Duarte da Silva

June 16, 2014

As long as it ends up in my glass and then in my mouth pour be damned!

Andrew Snyder
Andrew Snyder

June 16, 2014

“nice spittoon”

Dave
Dave

June 16, 2014

nice spittoon

Jeff
Jeff

June 16, 2014

What a great website!
(a little flattery never hurts)

Heidi McLain
Heidi McLain

June 16, 2014

I prefer the “reverse spit”—spitting down the back of my throat. How else can one evaluate the finish of a wine?

Barbara Berggreen
Barbara Berggreen

June 16, 2014

A really nice spittoon!

Jessica Creel
Jessica Creel

June 16, 2014

REALLY nice spittoon!

Gertie Grape
Gertie Grape

June 16, 2014

These are exciting photos – I’m looking forward to pouring tonight!

Rick
Rick

June 16, 2014

Looks nothing like the old spitoon that sat in the kitchen corner at my Great Grandfather’s house.

Margaret Reid
Margaret Reid

June 16, 2014

“nice spittoon” indeed

Ray Manza
Ray Manza

June 16, 2014

Have seen some great pours especially late at night. No pics unfortunately.

jim sipkins
jim sipkins

June 16, 2014

nothing like a splash in the pan [or glass] for high speed aeration

Jeff Grossman
Jeff Grossman

June 16, 2014

No doubt about it: “Dining on the Vine” gets the nod for wasting wine while attempting a show-off pour.

Nice spittoon.

VClyne
VClyne

June 16, 2014

That lovely spittoon will remain in pristine condition in my humble abode. It may be interesting to note that stylists are busy at work before the perfect photo is taken and that the wine may not really be wine at all but a colored and thickened liquid that will give the desired result. As any food stylist will readily admit, what you see in the media as a photo representation of any item can be totally unrelated to that item in its components. Still it is a lovely spittoon, cheers.

David Buckley
David Buckley

June 16, 2014

I don’t even say “taste”, I say “drink”…!

Jim
Jim

June 16, 2014

Pouring is part of the wine experience and as such needs respected.

Matthew
Matthew

June 16, 2014

Hmm, nice spittoon. I’m sure I could find some use for it somewhere in the house

Marco
Marco

June 16, 2014

This extreme pouring has me hyped up!
I feel like buying a few gallons of jug wine and trying my hand at some of this extreme pouring action. The photos should be awesome! ………. Just kidding but hey, “nice spittoon”!

Dan Collins
Dan Collins

June 16, 2014

I could be SPITTING some excellent Cab Francs today! I wish…

Dave Miller
Dave Miller

June 16, 2014

Actually that photo of Royal Doultan is kind of classy (even if it does look like Ginger Ale).

Michael B
Michael B

June 16, 2014

Reminds me of a experience visiting Napa and the tasting room host was inebriated. Good times!

Wilf Krutzmann
Wilf Krutzmann

June 16, 2014

Plonk should be “poured”. Really good wine should be shared with care.

Brenda
Brenda

June 16, 2014

nice spittoon

Al Legere
Al Legere

June 16, 2014

Is it “Nat Decants” or “Nat Splats”?

Just for fun at Candia Vineyards (candiavineyards.com), the owner Bob sometimes offers regular or radical decanting technique. Radical decanting involves full inversion of the bottle partway into the glass, and after just the right amount of Glug Glug Glug he retracts the bottle in front of the now-stunned consumer, never spilling a drop. With all the medals he gets for his wines, he should get another one for the great entertainment value he provides!

Rob Lau
Rob Lau

June 16, 2014

“nice spittoon”

Bret Kappus
Bret Kappus

June 16, 2014

Sweet….spitton

Tom Canty
Tom Canty

June 16, 2014

Spittoons? We don’t need no steenking spittoons!

Arthur
Arthur

June 16, 2014

67 Wine makes me think they are wine newbies or like beer better. :)

Barbara
Barbara

June 16, 2014

Chaos in a glass. Unsettling.

Josie  Della Serra
Josie Della Serra

June 16, 2014

Hmm… It’s too nice to really use as a spittoon…. But i will find a nice flower arrangement for it…..

Clark Smith
Clark Smith

June 16, 2014

This phenomenon obviously results from the plain and tragic fact that the Internet, being a medium that addresses sight and sound but is incapable of smell, taste and touch, is a singularly inappropriate home for the experience of wine. This gives rise to an awful lot of silly and irrelevant chatter along with these desperate attempts to work wine into the medium at hand. If we weren’t such entertaining writers, we should really both quit altogether. Maybe we should be writing about something else, like spittoons.

Sophie B
Sophie B

June 16, 2014

nice spittoon

Dennis Baltzis
Dennis Baltzis

June 16, 2014

Nice pics!

Matt
Matt

June 16, 2014

Love the over-the-topness of Dining on the Vine

Cactus Dave
Cactus Dave

June 16, 2014

a spitoon is something one never knows that one needs, until one does, and then it’s tooo late.

nikki sidebottom
nikki sidebottom

June 16, 2014

nice spittoon

Ray V
Ray V

June 16, 2014

Nice Spittoon

John Gale
John Gale

June 16, 2014

Reminds me when somebody poured clear liquid detergent into a glass and made it look tasty, until the bottle came into view.

Barb V
Barb V

June 16, 2014

Nice Spittoon it would look great in my wine celler. I’ll keep it nice and shiny too with a label that says where I got it because I never waste a good cab franc. (don’t let the people I work with see this wine pouring I just got them doing everything properly)

Kelvin
Kelvin

June 16, 2014

I guess no two wines are spilled alike. “Dining on the Vine” is the most objectionable. “67 Wine” is immodest but too subtle to be irreverent.

Dan Aguilar
Dan Aguilar

June 16, 2014

Spice Nittoon

Viking
Viking

June 16, 2014

what a lovely bucket to have in my cribb

Bob
Bob

June 16, 2014

Very nice spittoon. The generous pours are good if you are ordering them at a restaurant but for a wine judging, that is way too much.

Gilbert Grape
Gilbert Grape

June 16, 2014

I don’t want the spittoon, I just like gratuitously entering competitions

I don’t see that you’ll need a spittoon if you pour like that – you’ll barely have enough in the glass to sniff

Nancee
Nancee

June 16, 2014

67 Wine is a perfect demonstration of my pet peeve which concerns the way some restaurants pour wine: so much wine in the glass that it’s impossible to swirl the contents to enjoy all those delicious aromas. Of course you could swirl anyway and risk ruining your clothes, the tablecloth, and staining your dining companions!

Walt Rachele
Walt Rachele

June 16, 2014

Nice Spittoon. So many wines so little time …..to enjoy each one!

GARY STAUFFER
GARY STAUFFER

June 16, 2014

Those pours look that way after I have poured too much wine for myself.

Randy Holliday
Randy Holliday

June 16, 2014

Very nice spittoon. love to have it in my office!

Dining on the Vine has it going away for sheer drama and over the top silliness. But I am more intrigued by the NY Times, given the size, volume and sheer “tonnage” of the incoming pour. That’s a fire hose doing the service.

Jack
Jack

June 16, 2014

nice spittoon? I like to spit on winery floors.* Especially when they have no appropriate place to spit.

*Learned to do this in the Loire, where it’s proper.

Marc Grandmaison
Marc Grandmaison

June 16, 2014

I think all of the photos took time and energy and creative thinking, not to mention the wine itself, coutos to all of you. but i do certainly hope that the wine that was used was also consumed and not wasted, after all someone put thier time, effort and sweat into the making of the wine. Weather you have decided it was good or bad wine if it were athe only wine that was avalible to drink it would have transformed itself from “bad to good” right under your nose.
Again, great job on the photos. They all should win some category they all send a different message.
Happy Holidays to All and to All a Good wine

John Knuth
John Knuth

June 16, 2014

Too many look like me after too many!

Mo
Mo

June 16, 2014

IF that is REAL wine, they should be arrested for such waste. Don’t they know there are thirsty, (not necessarily starving) people in this world that would do almost anything for that spill! I would love that spittoon in my shop, right next to your Grape Varieties Chart. I make my customers spit into a tin bucket right now. Would add a little class to the place. thanks for the pics, nice photography by someone.

EL
EL

June 16, 2014

Is that one of those spittoons made in Italy?

Dick Green
Dick Green

June 16, 2014

nice spittoon

Jim Colbert
Jim Colbert

June 16, 2014

The New York Times image is the only one that actually makes the wine look like something I would not want to drink. As for the others … it’s just sad that a great beverage is tossed about so carelessly or ridiculously over poured. Sigh. Oh, by the way, nice spittoon

John Humphries
John Humphries

June 16, 2014

Nat is natty!

David J
David J

June 16, 2014

Poor me, I pored over the websites with pouring pictures that you showcased and now I need to taste something. Trouble is, unless I use a straw I cannot taste it without pouring first!! So, I will be pouring tonight but going straight to the drinking part without giving the pour any attention-it is just a means to an end!

Eric S Crane
Eric S Crane

June 16, 2014

Sorry, used up my clever quotations trying to wine that thing with the Rabbit.

Hunter Hammett
Hunter Hammett

June 16, 2014

Aeration is one thing but that’s just plain wasteful!!!

It is sad to see something as humble as wine transform into comercial excitment: “Dining on the Vine”.

Sorry I missed your deadline but not the chance to share my comments about the liquid I love.

Steve De Long
Steve De Long

June 16, 2014

WE HAVE A WINNER!

The Jim who wrote: “Pouring is part of the wine experience and as such needs respected.”

was chosen by the random number generator at random.org

Thank you everyone that took the time to enter and especially to the more thoughtful and funny comments.

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